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"I've been barbecued, stewed, screwed, tattooed, and fried by people claiming to be my friends."
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W. C. Fields
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"Nobody ever went broke underestimating the tastes of the American people."
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H. L. Mencken
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"There are no jokes. The truth is the funniest joke of all."
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Muhammad Ali
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"Discovery is seeing what everybody else has seen, and thinking what nobody else has thought."
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Szent-Gyorgi Albert
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"O Lord, help me to be pure, but not yet."
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St. Augustine
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"Ubi non accusator, ibi non judex. (Where there is no police, there is no speed limit.)"
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Roman Law, trans. Petr Beckmann (1971)
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"There is time for work, and there is time for love. That leaves no other time."
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Coco Chanel
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"Real art has the capacity to make us nervous."
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Susan Sontag
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"We can observe what happens [at midnight on 1999-12-31] in Western Samoa, New Zealand and Australia and still have 6 hours to make plans."
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PLN, Indonesia's national electricity board, when asked by an Indonesian newspaper about its Y2K preparedness.
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"In Vegas, I got into a long argument with the man at the roulette wheel over what I considered to be an odd number."
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Steven Wright
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